We’re in the middle of a male loneliness epidemic, or so we’re told.
Our social media feeds are filled with news stories, think pieces, and video commentaries lamenting the apparent pervasive sense of isolation our young men are afflicted with; the absence of deep friendships with other men and meaningful connections with women; the higher rates of depression and addiction.
And while the idea of a male loneliness epidemic itself feels a bit like a media fabrication, if such a debilitating emotional malady is indeed afflicting adolescent men, we really shouldn’t be surprised. Widespread male alienation and disconnection from society aren’t elusive, freak occurrences requiring deep, thorough forensic investigation; they're simply cause-and-effect.
If we’re going to talk about lonely men, we’re gonna need to address the orange elephant in the room.
For the last decade here in America, tens of millions of parents have elevated a vile, cruel, serial predator to a gilded throne of cultic adoration. They have rooted their politics, theology, and identity (and by extension their children) in a human being embodying the very worst of what it means to be a man; a court-adjudicated rapist whose contempt for women is one of the most well-documented in our nation’s history.
It should have been obvious what this misplaced idolatry would yield:
Young men with a dangerous sense of entitlement when it comes to the bodies of women.
Young men who are unable to tap into a compassion they have been repeatedly told is a sign of weakness.
It’s birthing young men violently allergic to sexuality that doesn’t match the rigid confines of their parents and pastors.
Young men who imagine whiteness and maleness are the pinnacle of human evolution.
Young men who believe they will get rewarded for their misogyny and dishonesty, because they’ve watched it happen for so much of their lives.
Young men incapable of taking accountability or apologizing.
In other words, it’s yielded young men who are becoming their fathers and their grandfathers, and the emotionally stunted man-children they’ve been told are role models.
Boys weaned on dudebro podcasts, twisted sexist theology, and the suspended adolescence of the Conservative manosphere have little chance of developing brains that evolve into mature adulthood. They are the unwitting heirs to a sad and hollow MAGA manhood that breeds bullies who sacrifice everything on the altar of power and brute force.
The entire MAGA movement is rooted in the most toxic of masculinities; perpetuating knuckle-dragging, emotionally fetal alpha male posturing; a culture of endless grievance and relentless aggression that rewards the crass, coronates the cruel, and celebrates the sexist.
There isn’t a great deal of investigative work necessary to draw the line from this kind of prehistoric, morally stunted male ideology to a generation of young men who can’t seem to figure out why women avoid them and why none of the other dudes around them give a damn about them or anything else. The cause and the cure are staring MAGA America in the mirror.
If parents want to inoculate their sons from a lifelong lonely existence, they need to stop raising them to be horrible human beings.
They need to give them better role models at home and in the men they present as worth emulating from a distance.
They need to teach them that emotions aren’t emasculating, that kindness isn’t weakness, and that caring deeply about other human beings is actually the highest thing they can aspire to.
The figurehead of the MAGA movement is an incredibly lonely human being who, by all accounts, lacks a single healthy relationship. Though cradled in wealth and influence most of us will never know, he is clearly incapable of meaningful connections with anyone, unable to care deeply about anyone but himself, and desperate to be loved while having no loving impulses whatsoever.
As long as a massive segment of our nation’s young men are being raised to see malignant narcissists like Donald Trump and like him as role models, a lifetime of emotional desolation, broken relationships, and great isolation is all but guaranteed.
If parents want to stop the male loneliness epidemic, they need to help tear down the Conservative manosphere, so that we can teach boys, not how to be “real men,” but how to be good, loving, empathetic humans who happen to be male.
I'm very sick of hearing about MALE loneliness. Why has this become a "thing" while WOMEN have been grappling with loneliness and inequity since the beginning of time. A state of dominance was declared, and we lost the fight early on. But whenever we speak out, we are silenced, shamed, and blamed. MEN, on the other hand, have found ways to get whatever they desire by WHINING about their privileges being taken away. WOMEN, on the other hand, have been oppressed for centuries. Since the Gutenberg arrived, historians have had tangible, palpable access to the historical EVIDENCE of women living under this burdensome, oppressive system where OUR NEEDS and RIGHTS are perpetually violated and abused. WE (women) are the true warriors. who get the jobs done neatly and unnoticed, then made redundant by having our efforts ignored. We are the ones who are left behind to sweep up the f---ing messes that you create. We keep doing what we do. But know this: we NOW KNOW the scheme. WE SEE YOU!.
While we've learned, historically, when to keep our mouths shut, we're not going to be silent anymore.
The current maelstrom is YOUR DOING. Not ours. When the world ends, it will be the result of the exponential GREED sown in our ancient culture. Now it's destroying the entire planet.
So when we see these men WHINING about their "rights" being violated, that they have been made redundant, and there is an entire MOVEMENT of WHINING MEN who champion the likes of YouKNOWho, it's a gutpunch for women. WTF???
I'm not saying women have no role in the devolution of this culture. What I'm saying is that historically, men have perpetually USED women as their tools to wrest and gain access to power. It's a crooked system, and deep down, everyone knows it. Men invented the system that is now killing us.
Men, the tide is turning. I warn you, this is not the time to come whining about your rights getting violated. There is a quiet army of women who have had enough, and we are f---king disgusted. We've see behind your curtain. Listen: the patriarchy is coming to roost.
We are sick of the whining! Because we've been stuck in the same place for generations, having our rights ignored and blatantly VIOLATED for centuries. We've endured abuse in every imaginable way. AND YOU KNOW IT because you've let it happen. This is not new. It is ancient brutality, and it is generational. It is male dominance gone rogue.
Hear this: if you are disgusted with Jeffrey Epstein, you have to STOP believing it's just about one creepy dude who sinisterly, systematically created a system to abuse vulnerable females (and probably innocent males too), you have to get a grip: ONE man could not do this on his own. This is not one man. It is an entire SYSTEM of abuse of power. It's bigger than anyone can imagine, and I say this knowing I will be accused of paranoia. One day, if we survive as a species, future generations will look at our culture and puzzle over how we as a species have enabled EVIL men to dominate the planet. What's more, their selfishness, their brutal conquests, assaults on women and innocent children have allowed them to exploit the community globally. The invisible abuse? I cannot begin to say it. It's happening right now before all our eyes. And no one is doing anything about it because MEN are the ones in power. Yes, there are women involved. They're not innocent, but they are not to be blamed. Many of them are hostages. They tragically succumbed to a system where they learned to survive. The mindf---k is powerful. It's a cancer. SEE this for what it is. The women who are complicit-- I don't forgive them. I would posit that they are the unknowing victims of multigenerational grooming. It's the Stockholm effect: they are irrevocably steeped in subjugation. I do think it's only fair to question how much blame they truly deserve.
Men, if you are beginning to experience the negative effects of psychological terrorism, and you are confronted with the raw fear of not being believed, get F---ING used to it! Because women have no patience with this trend anymore. WE are sick of the PATRIARCHY, and we are sick of your whining. While we have no recourse, we will not remain silent. At the very least, I refuse. I REFUSE.
So men are feeling sad and oppressed now?? AWW!!! They're feeling deprived, ignored, invisible? USED UP, unseen, mocked, made irrelevant? Their sacred, sexual "RIGHTS" to f--ck others (both figuratively and literally) are being inconvenienced? AWWW! I implore you: embrace the reality of what has happened and is still happening. Women continue to absorb the daily assaults, the blame, and the shame, so why don't you, as Shakespeare so eloquently put it, "Screw this to the sticking place!"
All I can say is BOO HOO! Amplify that. Let that echo. Let it reverberate for all time. Because it's time we start calling this WHAT IT IS. I will be silent no longer. I will review this when I am in a better mood. If this comment does not get deleted, I might delete it myself. Right now, I am feeling just FED UP, and although I know I should abstain, I can't help myself. While I do still consider myself a lady, I've said nothing untrue. But I do apologize for the unfortunate use of offensive words and acronyms.
What these right wing males fail to understand is that females, all females, are looking for a partnership not subservience. Young women may try to flatter that infamous “male ego” and make him think he is all that. But they hope he is faithful and loving above anything else. If he is influenced to be “manly” in a bullying narcissistic fashion, women with self esteem will rebel and dump him. Some males are reflective and realize the mistakes they have made, then vow to do better and be better. Others become dug in and misogynistic. Those are the insecure ones who buy into the hierarchy propaganda. Then, of course, they will be lonely. And angry. And unhappy.