5 Reasons Trump's "Eating Dogs" Tirade Isn't Funny

In the wake of the Presidential Debate, in which Republican nominee Donald Trump launched into an unprompted, rambling tirade about people in Springfield, Ohio “eating the dogs”, social media has rightly exploded with memes, dance videos, remixes, parodies, and commentaries mocking him unmercilessly—giving birth to some truly hysterical content.

And yes, the absolutely ludicrous nature of his baseless non sequitur was and is (as telegraphed beautifully by the Vice President’s face in real-time) so absurd, that the first response is laughing disbelief that such abject stupidity is spewing from the mouth of a man within a few percentage points of becoming president.

However, Trump’s comments about Haitians in Ohio are anything but funny, and here are five reasons they’re actually worse than you think:

1. They show the Republican Party’s systemic sickness.

On the day of the debate, the “Haitians eating pets” story (one that had at that point, already been disproven and vehemently denied and condemned as false and dangerous by the Springfield mayor, local police, and the press) was being shared on nearly every Republican politician’s and surrogate’s social media profiles. In addition to Trump, JD Vance, Ted Cruz, Nancy Mace, and Elon Musk, among dozens of others, relentlessly bombed Twitter with AI-generated propaganda which was exponentially amplified by the MAGA rank-and-file. It was the latest in a coordinated attempt to distract and divert attention from the actual issues by a party that is bereft of policies, plans, or vision of any substance that seeks to affirm the common good.

2. They illustrate Trump’s desperation and cognitive decline.

That Trump would embrace as fact, something so transparently ludicrous and so lacking in objective data of any kind, shows that he is surrounded by people who understand that he is not able to differentiate fact from fiction or to separate wise from ridiculous ideas; that he will parrot anything he is fed. Clearly, this calculated lie was something forefront in his mind during the debate, as he felt the need to blurt it out during a completely unrelated portion of the event. It had all that hallmarks of a panicking man, who realized he was flailing and failing in front of tens of millions of Americans, and this was an obvious “in case of emergency, break glass” moment for him.

3.They are recklessly but intentionally racist.

This undeserved attack on brown-skinned immigrants is part of the MAGA Republican playbook: vilify, demonize, and dehumanize a group of people of color in an effort to leverage the irrational fear of uneducated or easily-manipulated white people (which is the lion’s share of Trump’s base). It’s the same reason his response to nearly every debate question on all matters of policy and subject, devolved into a dire warning about criminal immigrants supposedly streaming into our country—ignoring of course, that Trump personally destroyed the greatest bi-partisan border bill a couple months ago. This racism, which is the only vernacular the GOP speaks in, has led to bomb threats, death threats, and vandalism for Haitians and people of color in Springfield. It is further placing all foreigners and people of color in harm’s way.

4. They foreshadow the ugliness of America in a second Trump Term.

Trump has already promised the greatest mass deportation in America’s history, in which he would as president, weaponize the Department of Justice, the United States Military, and local law enforcement (as well as citizens loyal to him) in order to round up and incarcerate or expel who he determines “illegals”. Given Trump’s previous desire to use military force against the American people (as detailed regarding the George Floyd protests here) is little doubt that he will, at his whim, abuse the incredible powers at his disposal to disregard the human and civil rights of any group or individuals he chooses, without due process. It will, in affect be government-sanctioned vigilantism that will certainly not end with immigrants.

5. They won’t matter to any of his followers.

The most tragic (if not unsurprising) reality of Trump’s gross, false, and dangerous comments is that they are unlikely to move any of his sycophantic base from their embrace of him and surely won’t change their vote. I spoke with a Trump supporter the day after the retreat and said, “They’re eating the dogs, they’re eating the cats…” expecting him to at the very least, share some embarrassment at the historically awkward and completely unprecedented moment. He shrugged and simply said, “But it’s true, though.”

And that is the most frightening and disturbing thing of all that we should take away from this moment, amid our laughter and ridicule. What should be an immediate campaign-killer in the eyes of decent, moral human beings, is nothing to the tens of millions who find their identity intertwined with his. Now nine years indoctrinated into this sad, unhinged cult of American whiteness, Trump supporters don’t care about reality, only about the narrative they need to be true in their heads in order to justify their allegiance. There is no bridge too far, no crime or offense too sickening to move them from him, no violence or falsehoods that will be dealbreakers.

And this is why the vote of every single good, compassionate, and responsible adult matters: because we have to collectively rise up to reject baseless conspiracy, irresponsible racism, lawless political leaders, and cognitively-addled would-be presidents with unchecked power.

We aren’t just voting against Donald Trump and JD Vance, but an entire political party polluted to the point of targeting a group of decent, hardworking people simply living their lives.

We’re voting against our neighbors, friends, and family members who want a political victory even if it means trafficking in lies, racism, and fear.

And as importantly, when we vote for Kamala Harris, we are voting for the Haitian people here, and Americans of color, and Muslims, and people with dark skin, and foreigners, and legal immigrants and refugees.

We’re voting for every single human being of a vulnerable, marginalized, oppressed community who might be the next target of a political party and movement that has no moral compass or commitment to truth.

We all need to make our voices heard at the polls, because as laughable as this latest tirade of Trump’s has been—it’s far from funny.]