102 Comments
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Stephanie Reeve's avatar

Thank you for this. I want to live in a world of strong women and beta-males.

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Kathleen's avatar

me too

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Jayne Spence's avatar

Me too

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julie's avatar

Me, too!

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Al Ross III's avatar

John

I am a “beta-male” , all three of my sons from 32-44 years old proudly are “Beta-Males”!! Thank you for describing us to a T! We welcome all MAGA criticism.

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Faitz Funny's avatar

Keb Mo has a song called 'Better Man' - can easily be changed to Beta Man !

I'm gonna make my world a better place

I'm gonna keep that smile on my face

I'm gonna teach myself how to understand

I'm gonna make myself a beta man

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Marilyn Cattanach's avatar

I also love his "Put a Woman in Charge". Clearly a beta.

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Faitz Funny's avatar

oh definitely !

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michellefromchicago's avatar

Ken Mo is a great artist, a lovely human being, and -- clearly -- a man who, unlike MAGA guys, is secure in his masculinity!

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Lisa's avatar

Love Keb Mo!

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Thayne's avatar

A father’s progress:

For years, my concept of “manliness” was built around the question, “How can I help the women in my life feel safer?”

It took my having a daughter to realize what I should have asked was, “How can I help the women in my life grow stronger?’

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Lisa's avatar

Beautiful post. Thank you!

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bitchybitchybitchy's avatar

Thank you!

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MARGARET KENDALL's avatar

A beta male is my kind of male! My father was an alpha male, and I decided I didn't want to marry anyone like him. There were a few "scars" from being the daughter of one, but I was able to leave. It was actually a lesson. I learned what I did not want.

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Joe English's avatar

Beta testing is the way new things are rolled out in their final phase. Traditionally to be part of the beta testing phase is an honor; it shows that you have some specialized skills to be able to work out and advise on the final kinks. With time beta testing has become an overused descriptor.

Given this, the next step is when there is the launch of the finished or 'alpha' phase.

Hence, John you are simply on your way to being the new version of the alpha male. But since you are fallable, and that is far more fun, I'd say stick with the beta phase. And keep testing your capacities for all things human.

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Robot Bender's avatar

I was going to point out the same thing. 😁

Besides, this "Alpha, Beta" male crap is based on old, falsified research. Scientists discovered that wolves in captivity live very differently than the ones in the wild. In the wild, wolf packs are matriarchal.

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Joe English's avatar

Yes Gregg indeed. I was implying technology and product before their final release, but all the other aspects of the Alpha/Beta/Theta stuff also applies (including to brain waves and we need all 3 type of those to 'be').

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Kim Hamblin's avatar

Beta males don’t need tweaking like software. They are complete as they are. Beta males are the final rollout.

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Joe English's avatar

Love it!

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Leslie Williams's avatar

I think you're describing the 'omega male:' not just the next iteration (beta) of manhood, but the highest ideal of it.

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Pete Lo's avatar

Inner strength, compassion, empathy, reliability, dignity, doing what is right instead of what is easy, sticking to you morals and beliefs, confidence, kindness, are all part of being a man. This crap that MAGA is selling, is wrong and vile and is not manly at all.

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Roxana Chitu's avatar

I wouldn't accept no 'label" whatsoever

You are more a man than any of the MAGA specimens who are ruled by the strength of the "pack" rather than an individual who finds the strength in actually being vulnerable and kind

There is still Hope 🙏❤️

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Kim H's avatar

I couldn't agree more, John. Thank you 💙🙏🦋

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Suze's avatar

I am sure your son will grow up having absorbed your values and be confident enough in his identity as a man not to need to embrace “alpha male” tendencies. I have been reading a lot about gendered qualities, and many boys are brought up to reject so-called “feminine” traits, such as “don’t cry”, “you need to be strong” etc and therefore end up hating anything feminine, including women. If we look more closely, though, these qualities are not exclusively feminine, they are human qualities. When compassion, empathy and caring are considered “weak” it takes radical courage to reject that notion and decide to be a better man - not a beta male. Keep modelling those qualities, John. And be unapologetic about it.

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Laurie Wesolow's avatar

I am proudly married to a beta male and I have two well educated daughters who have also partnered with supportive and kind beta males. And I would have it no other way.

As I'm watching many young "alpha" males sitting in their parents basements whining and playing video games because women don't want to date them, I see many other parents encouraging their daughters to succeed academically and take on leadership roles.

Unless parents like you John, model what women truly want in a partner, there are going to be a lot of miserable parents and young men continuing to whine. And when the parents of the alpha male need care in their elderly years, I sure hope that they have a strong daughter or they will end up in the basement with their alpha son.

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John R. Deckert's avatar

I too am glad to be considered a beta male.

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John Schwarzkopf's avatar

I'm proud to be a beta male. If I was one of those "alpha" douchebags I'd jump off a bridge.

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Sharon Castillo's avatar

I don't think u would jump off a bridge because u would be in a reality that thought it was ok to be an alpha douchbag. So glad to know u are conscious, loving and a beta male!

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John Schwarzkopf's avatar

Excellent point. I hadn't thought of it that way.

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S. Mullany's avatar

Thank you for your excellent clinic on ideal manhood. Women who are fortunate to grow up with healthy relationships with such men will seek similar examples as life partners and avoid the immature, abusive, so-called “alpha males”.

The current culture ignores the blinding inconsistency of this unhealthy example of domination-submission in the male-female relationship and their simultaneous claim to be icons of Christian heritage. Your children are blessed with a healthy loving father and the world is a better place because of a “beta”

man.

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Christina Johnson's avatar

My husband, West Point grad, Army officer, businessman was the MOST BETA MALE ever. He was thoughtful, kind, truly engaged in humanity and cared about everything and everyone. He died 3 years ago of complications of dementia. Even though he was extremely needy, he was never ever cruel or abusive.

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Kathleen's avatar

We do need more people like you!

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