(Warning: strong language, NSFW)
Men of America, we need to have some real talk about something.
America is approaching one of the most important and consequential days in our history—and we are in danger of fucking it up.
I’m writing this on National Daughters Day and according to many polls, nearly sixty percent of us are still planning on voting for Donald Trump in the upcoming election.
If these estimates hold and we become the single greatest reason he ascends to power again, it will be a collective failure of us as fathers, as husbands, as partners, as sons and brothers and friends and neighbors and coworkers.
We will have knowingly participated in a legislative assault on women’s bodies, we will have turned our backs on our responsibility to protect the girls and women in our care, and we will have declared that the female population of this nation is less important than our tenuous masculinity.
We will move from being fathers and spouses and partners and sons—and we will become willing accomplices.
Guys, what will it say about us if we knowingly choose to elevate a court-adjudicated rapist to the presidency: a man accused by dozens of women of sexual assault or misconduct, a man connected with human trafficker and pedophile Jeffrey Epstein, a serial adulterer, a payer of porn stars, a man whose entire life and career are littered with disregard for women?
What reason will you give to justify empowering a predator whose plan is to completely take away women’s body autonomy?
Because you think he’ll keep your vacation home’s taxes low?
Because he promises to deport immigrants?
Because you think he’s a “straight shooter?”
Because he has his name on some buildings?
Because you watched him on TV?
Are these really enough to vote against the interests of the baby you tearfully held in the delivery room, the middle schooler you cheered in the Spring musical, the radiant young woman you walked down the aisle?
Are they enough to partner in marginalizing the woman you stood in a church or hillside and vowed your love and respect to, the brilliant and beautiful partner who you’ve built a life with?
Are those flimsy excuses enough to align yourself with a sexual assaulter whose presence will loom larger in the decisions over your sister’s or daughter’s or neighbor’s body than her doctor or her parter?
It’s time we cut the bullshit here, fellas.
Donald Trump, in any other circumstance and in any other setting would be the kind of man we wouldn’t allow within a mile of our daughters. Were a man proven in court to have sexually assaulted at least one woman and likely many others employed at their schools, we’d have raised holy hell for his expulsion. If a coach or teacher treated our girls like he’s treated other girls, it would probably take an army to keep us from kicking the living shit out of him.
If our wives and partners and girl friends and mothers encountered a predator like him in their workplaces, we’d encourage them to leave and never go back. We’d call HR and bring lawsuits and demand he be unable to ever harm another woman ever again.
If a neighbor or church friend or family member was guilty of what Donald Trump is guilty of and said the kind of vile, dehumanizing things about women that he has, we’d be the first ones in his face telling him to stay the hell away from our daughters, wives, sisters.
In those cases, we’d be the fighter and advocate and protector. We’d stand up the monster.
So what is the damn problem here?
Are you really going to completely deny your morality and throw away your convictions, because you don’t want to vote for a woman?
Is your ego that fragile and your misogyny that deep and your sexism that much a part of you that stepping into the voting booth and choosing Kamala Harris feels like a loss of your manhood?
And actually, I don’t give a shit about your manhood, I’m more concerned with your humanhood: just what matters to you, what kind of world you want to be a part of building, the legacy you want to leave of your time here, who you claim to be.
Guys, this election is a test of our collective goodness and it is one that we cannot fail.
And electing Donald Trump would be a spectacular and grotesque failure, the depth and consequences of which we cannot fathom.
And so this is really a gut check for all of us, guys, and because of this, I hope you’ll think about not going into the voting booth alone.
I hope you’ll take your daughters and wives and mothers and sisters and friends into the voting booth with you, and that you will vote to protect them, to honor them, to love them, to respect them enough not to subject them to someone with contempt for them.
I’d tell you to be a real man, but instead I’ll ask you to good man—and it won’t require you to lose anything. It won’t require you to be soft or to be weak.
It will just require you to vote for a woman.
I think the women you love are worth it.
I became a paid subscriber after your column yesterday. Today… I think I just want to cry and tell you as a 72-year-old woman, what you have written here to your fellow male humans in America, both breaks my heart and makes me want to scream:
THIS!! THIS is what every American of voting age needs to recognize! In this election, there are millions of American men who are trying to take away every woman’s most basic human FREEDOM. My body is mine. It makes me want to effing scream and cry that I actually have to declare that.
I suspect that every male that is reading your column on a regular basis is not the man we need to speak to here. But y’all men may be the ones who need to amplify John’s message here. Please.
Yes… Reproductive rights are about as fundamental as it gets. Except there’s an even more fundamental right. The right to autonomy over our body. Period.
I am childless 72 year old American woman who has fought and marched and spoken and written for the right for women to be recognized as equal human beings since I was a teenager. I will never stop advocating for the rights and dignity of women.
Can you begin to imagine how SEARING it is to a woman’s heart and mind to know what Donald Trump can do if he is elected again?!?
THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
In solidarity, thank you John. Thank you all.
Great article wirh terrific points. Wish this could be printed on a larger platform. Needs a USA Today full page!