A reader told me that she thinks I’ve become too negative lately: that she misses the optimistic, hopeful version of me that she got to know during Kamala Harris’ 2024 presidential campaign.
My precious wife fought stage four cancer for a year and a month before it claimed her. Her wisdom was this: “Fighters aren‘t fighters because they‘re gonna win. Fighters are fighters because they‘re gonna fight.“ Anne, I love you and miss you. ❤️
Dear Jessica, how beautiful, thank you... I was choked up for the better part of the day after reading this! We all carry the light of those we love after they've gone... something tells me you carry the light of someone very, very special as well. You do them proud. Blessings
How about love while carrying a big stick? I don't need happy talk. I need real recommendations to combat this fascist take-over of America. Musk and Trump have to be stopped now. My father and uncle fought in WW2. My mother worked on planes in Seattle. I met Holocaust survivors. One of my father's friends after the war was a French resistance fighter who was imprisoned. We are deep in the muck here. I'm not scared anymore. I'm just mad and determined.
Amen! My parents were 20 & 17 in their homeland of Denmark when the Nazis invaded & occupied their country. Dad was in the Danish King's Guard-Army. They both helped Danish Jews escape to Sweden. Those of us that have "connections" to WWII, know all kinds of stories. They are the best reason for us to be mad & determined to fight like hell to keep democracy alive. Thanks, Rita, for "Love while carrying a big stick" :)
Dear Rita: It took me a while, but I finally tracked down this passage from Rob Brezsny:
"Remember, there is a difference between grateful anger and dehumanizing hatred," he shouted above the din.
"What do you mean?" I yelled back.
"Grateful anger is good darkness. Dehumanizing hatred is bad darkness."
"More clues, please."
"Grateful anger flows when you have engaged and studied your shadow. Dehumanizing hatred flows when you have ignored and denied your shadow. One is fertile, the other hysterical."
A mathematical formula: I liked that. I assumed he meant the shadow that Carl Jung described. The unripe and unillumined corners of the soul.
He continued: "Grateful anger is when you feel thankful for the irritating people and sickening situations that have spurred you to clarity and righteous action. Dehumanizing hatred is when you are so in love with your terrible emotion that you forget what needs to be changed and turn yourself into your enemy."
Thank you for sharing. This is beautiful and illuminating. This is not where I wanted to be at 77. I'm tired and I'm stressed, but as I told me husband, I think I'm rising to this moment. And I have a lot of anger. Most of it is grateful.
It is bad but not hopeless. And we do have to fight and protect the vulnerable. It is serious but not hopeless. I believe unhappy people hurt people. Trump. Musk, Vance and the Republican enablers are not happy people even with all their money. Laughter and joy heals and I am committed to being a happy activist. No one is going to steal my joy, especially this administration.
Anyone who has been psychologically abused knows that feeling of “I don’t matter “. Donald is psychologically abusing us all. He tells us every day that we don’t matter. He tells us with his words and action. He repeats his wacko psychological statements and actions so often that millions of abused Americans believe they don’t matter anymore and so they don’t fight. They concede. The best mantra for ourselves at this time is: “I am a worthwhile person and I matter and I am not a second class citizen “. Who we are, what we believe, what good we do, how we raise respectful children, where we spend, and who we associate with will define a society that matters and has true value. Here’s the new bumper sticker: I matter. We matter. Trump antimatter.
I was raised by two complicit narcissistic parents. Out of four children I was the scapegoat. Blamed for everything that went wrong. For 18 years I was bathed in abuse of every kind. The mantra they tried to drive into me was “you can’t, you won’t, you’ll never . . .” They tried to instill in me that I was a worthless piece of shit. I was BAD. I had no worth and no value. Sometimes I succumbed and felt like such a failure. BUT I more than survived. I was as rebellious as they come - something in me refused to receive their lies, their gaslighting, darkness and hate and cruelty. I would not come into agreement with any of that. As an adult my counselors have assured me many times that it was my rebellion that saved me. My willingness to fight for my freedom kept me off drugs and off the streets.
I recognize the mind games and abuse this regime is using to try to break our entire country and make us so afraid we give up. We have to determine to just say NO. And remind each other everyday. We DO matter!! Each of us is unique and has the power to reject hate and embrace Love. But we have to fight every way we can. I KNOW we can both survive and thrive!!
John, yes! Each in our own way must stand and fight. If that means contributing to causes a little beyond our means to do so, so be it. If that means posting things on social media that may offend people we care about, so be it. If something lies ahead that pulls us out of our comfort zone, so be it. This is our Purpose for being right here, right now - to stand together and Fight. God will be with us on the side of good and help us through whatever pain our fighting may cause us.
Thank you for the inspiration. My life has been quite the journey. Lots of wonderful things but lots of struggles and heartaches as well. At times it has seemed like one huge mess that makes no sense. The pain, the brokenness, mental and physical health struggles, heart wrenching betrayals, dead end roads . . . intermingled with beauty, laughter, the infectious joy of little ones, trips to the ocean . . . sometimes I have looked towards the heavens, both up above and within and asked “what the hell is happening right now?”
But today, in the midst of these uncharted waters I hear that still small voice “you were made for such a time as this”. And all I can respond to that call is “okay”. I, we, are meant to be here at this time and in this place.
I have some renewed hope today. Musk/Trump cut personnel from the Social Security Administration. That’s clearly a broken promise. I don’t think it will sit well with Republican constituents and their Congressmen will hear from them. They didn’t cut benefits; they cut efficiency, no matter what they say. When the checks stop coming or get behind or late, there should be an outcry. Congress should not permit it. It’s time for Musk to go; he shouldn’t have been there anyway.
I like to remind myself that millions of senior citizens voted for Trump so it’ll be interesting to see what happens if he starts messing around with their Social Security and Medicare benefits.
Millions of precariously middle class citizens voted this in. I'm resigned to the fact that the bottom will have to fall out to earn their attention and wrath. And it will. The rest of us have to hang on for the ride. It's gonna get ugly
I’m on a Medicare Advantage plan and the dollar amount that l’m covered for certain services was reduced significantly, so consequently, I’m paying more out of pocket for certain services.
They’re not going to get rid of Medicare/Medicaid, but they’re how much Medicare will cover.
Beneficiaries will feel the sting in their wallets and pocketbooks.
I didn’t want to read you tonite, John. I didn’t want to be jollied along.
And you felt me, and perhaps thousands (I’m hoping beyond hope for MILLIONS) of US…
YOU & Me and Millions of disillusioned people from ‘every walk of life’ wanting Our Democracy to be lead by LOVING, Intelligent, hard working, team building, warm-hearted WORKER BEES… men & women unafraid of getting dirty and worn out doing our jobs, bringing up our families, teaching our children how to use the tools of our trades and our households. Sharing our challenges and our wins with open-hearted pleasure in just being in the great mix of our American democracy…. We CAN
DO THIS. Overcome what feels/looks/probably IS the greatest challenge our country has faced since World War Two.
We just have to get up everyday and put our best out there to build community with our fellow travelers.
I’m praying & going to sleep .
I KNOW I am committed to Saving My country. I will be with you all on this path.
There's another way: We need to learn about countries in this world where massive mobilization of citizens in the streets, using non-violent resistance, and in the Halls of Congress and in their local congressperson's office to bring about the needed shift away from dictatorship. We need to write our congresspeople every day, a different request about what we want from our government and don't want. Let them know we support them in standing up, and thank them repeatedly and ask them repeatedly to stand up even more and that we will keep supporting them as long as it takes. Attend ALL of the marches and protests that happen in your community. Join the increasing number of groups that are forming to protest and create the new future we want. Create a regular connection to the Aide of your Congressman. We need to go to their offices and be in the Halls of Congress over and over. One thing Americans have never learned, at least in large groups, is the immense effectiveness of their own collective power. Do research to discover the immense amount of rising up that is now going on in our country. Do NOT sit by and watch. It is our RESPONSIBILITY to get involved and not stand by.
My precious wife fought stage four cancer for a year and a month before it claimed her. Her wisdom was this: “Fighters aren‘t fighters because they‘re gonna win. Fighters are fighters because they‘re gonna fight.“ Anne, I love you and miss you. ❤️
She sounds like a beautiful soul. I'm so sorry.
Thank you. ❤️
I’ll be carrying that quote with me forever. Look at how Anne is changing lives even after she is gone. That’s pretty amazing.
Dear Jessica, how beautiful, thank you... I was choked up for the better part of the day after reading this! We all carry the light of those we love after they've gone... something tells me you carry the light of someone very, very special as well. You do them proud. Blessings
How about love while carrying a big stick? I don't need happy talk. I need real recommendations to combat this fascist take-over of America. Musk and Trump have to be stopped now. My father and uncle fought in WW2. My mother worked on planes in Seattle. I met Holocaust survivors. One of my father's friends after the war was a French resistance fighter who was imprisoned. We are deep in the muck here. I'm not scared anymore. I'm just mad and determined.
Amen! My parents were 20 & 17 in their homeland of Denmark when the Nazis invaded & occupied their country. Dad was in the Danish King's Guard-Army. They both helped Danish Jews escape to Sweden. Those of us that have "connections" to WWII, know all kinds of stories. They are the best reason for us to be mad & determined to fight like hell to keep democracy alive. Thanks, Rita, for "Love while carrying a big stick" :)
Thank you Marianne. It's honestly good to meet people like you. God bless your parents. I know my parents would be devastated by what's happening.
Dear Rita: It took me a while, but I finally tracked down this passage from Rob Brezsny:
"Remember, there is a difference between grateful anger and dehumanizing hatred," he shouted above the din.
"What do you mean?" I yelled back.
"Grateful anger is good darkness. Dehumanizing hatred is bad darkness."
"More clues, please."
"Grateful anger flows when you have engaged and studied your shadow. Dehumanizing hatred flows when you have ignored and denied your shadow. One is fertile, the other hysterical."
A mathematical formula: I liked that. I assumed he meant the shadow that Carl Jung described. The unripe and unillumined corners of the soul.
He continued: "Grateful anger is when you feel thankful for the irritating people and sickening situations that have spurred you to clarity and righteous action. Dehumanizing hatred is when you are so in love with your terrible emotion that you forget what needs to be changed and turn yourself into your enemy."
--Rob Brezsny, "The Televisionary Oracle"
Thank you for sharing. This is beautiful and illuminating. This is not where I wanted to be at 77. I'm tired and I'm stressed, but as I told me husband, I think I'm rising to this moment. And I have a lot of anger. Most of it is grateful.
It is bad but not hopeless. And we do have to fight and protect the vulnerable. It is serious but not hopeless. I believe unhappy people hurt people. Trump. Musk, Vance and the Republican enablers are not happy people even with all their money. Laughter and joy heals and I am committed to being a happy activist. No one is going to steal my joy, especially this administration.
Thank you, as always, for saying what needs to be said. Love love love.
Anyone who has been psychologically abused knows that feeling of “I don’t matter “. Donald is psychologically abusing us all. He tells us every day that we don’t matter. He tells us with his words and action. He repeats his wacko psychological statements and actions so often that millions of abused Americans believe they don’t matter anymore and so they don’t fight. They concede. The best mantra for ourselves at this time is: “I am a worthwhile person and I matter and I am not a second class citizen “. Who we are, what we believe, what good we do, how we raise respectful children, where we spend, and who we associate with will define a society that matters and has true value. Here’s the new bumper sticker: I matter. We matter. Trump antimatter.
I was raised by two complicit narcissistic parents. Out of four children I was the scapegoat. Blamed for everything that went wrong. For 18 years I was bathed in abuse of every kind. The mantra they tried to drive into me was “you can’t, you won’t, you’ll never . . .” They tried to instill in me that I was a worthless piece of shit. I was BAD. I had no worth and no value. Sometimes I succumbed and felt like such a failure. BUT I more than survived. I was as rebellious as they come - something in me refused to receive their lies, their gaslighting, darkness and hate and cruelty. I would not come into agreement with any of that. As an adult my counselors have assured me many times that it was my rebellion that saved me. My willingness to fight for my freedom kept me off drugs and off the streets.
I recognize the mind games and abuse this regime is using to try to break our entire country and make us so afraid we give up. We have to determine to just say NO. And remind each other everyday. We DO matter!! Each of us is unique and has the power to reject hate and embrace Love. But we have to fight every way we can. I KNOW we can both survive and thrive!!
This is sad, this is oddly joyful, too. The effect on me was one of a terrible beauty.
John, yes! Each in our own way must stand and fight. If that means contributing to causes a little beyond our means to do so, so be it. If that means posting things on social media that may offend people we care about, so be it. If something lies ahead that pulls us out of our comfort zone, so be it. This is our Purpose for being right here, right now - to stand together and Fight. God will be with us on the side of good and help us through whatever pain our fighting may cause us.
Thank you for the inspiration. My life has been quite the journey. Lots of wonderful things but lots of struggles and heartaches as well. At times it has seemed like one huge mess that makes no sense. The pain, the brokenness, mental and physical health struggles, heart wrenching betrayals, dead end roads . . . intermingled with beauty, laughter, the infectious joy of little ones, trips to the ocean . . . sometimes I have looked towards the heavens, both up above and within and asked “what the hell is happening right now?”
But today, in the midst of these uncharted waters I hear that still small voice “you were made for such a time as this”. And all I can respond to that call is “okay”. I, we, are meant to be here at this time and in this place.
I have some renewed hope today. Musk/Trump cut personnel from the Social Security Administration. That’s clearly a broken promise. I don’t think it will sit well with Republican constituents and their Congressmen will hear from them. They didn’t cut benefits; they cut efficiency, no matter what they say. When the checks stop coming or get behind or late, there should be an outcry. Congress should not permit it. It’s time for Musk to go; he shouldn’t have been there anyway.
I like to remind myself that millions of senior citizens voted for Trump so it’ll be interesting to see what happens if he starts messing around with their Social Security and Medicare benefits.
Millions of precariously middle class citizens voted this in. I'm resigned to the fact that the bottom will have to fall out to earn their attention and wrath. And it will. The rest of us have to hang on for the ride. It's gonna get ugly
I’m on a Medicare Advantage plan and the dollar amount that l’m covered for certain services was reduced significantly, so consequently, I’m paying more out of pocket for certain services.
They’re not going to get rid of Medicare/Medicaid, but they’re how much Medicare will cover.
Beneficiaries will feel the sting in their wallets and pocketbooks.
“they’re reducing how much Medicare will cover”
We didn't vote for him, and I've left messages to everyone I can think of. When Steve Bannon of all people says this is a mistake, it is mistake.
I'd rather know what they're doing, the better to oppose them.
I’m going to read this every morning!
I didn’t want to read you tonite, John. I didn’t want to be jollied along.
And you felt me, and perhaps thousands (I’m hoping beyond hope for MILLIONS) of US…
YOU & Me and Millions of disillusioned people from ‘every walk of life’ wanting Our Democracy to be lead by LOVING, Intelligent, hard working, team building, warm-hearted WORKER BEES… men & women unafraid of getting dirty and worn out doing our jobs, bringing up our families, teaching our children how to use the tools of our trades and our households. Sharing our challenges and our wins with open-hearted pleasure in just being in the great mix of our American democracy…. We CAN
DO THIS. Overcome what feels/looks/probably IS the greatest challenge our country has faced since World War Two.
We just have to get up everyday and put our best out there to build community with our fellow travelers.
I’m praying & going to sleep .
I KNOW I am committed to Saving My country. I will be with you all on this path.
I’m ready for my “marching orders”. Six weeks in, I’m done with this Administration.
Thank you. You are right on target. It may be hard to love some people but we need to do it.
Warriors we are and from the battle we emerge triumphant.
Thanks, John. Encouraging words. Heart and courage have the same word root in French.
There's another way: We need to learn about countries in this world where massive mobilization of citizens in the streets, using non-violent resistance, and in the Halls of Congress and in their local congressperson's office to bring about the needed shift away from dictatorship. We need to write our congresspeople every day, a different request about what we want from our government and don't want. Let them know we support them in standing up, and thank them repeatedly and ask them repeatedly to stand up even more and that we will keep supporting them as long as it takes. Attend ALL of the marches and protests that happen in your community. Join the increasing number of groups that are forming to protest and create the new future we want. Create a regular connection to the Aide of your Congressman. We need to go to their offices and be in the Halls of Congress over and over. One thing Americans have never learned, at least in large groups, is the immense effectiveness of their own collective power. Do research to discover the immense amount of rising up that is now going on in our country. Do NOT sit by and watch. It is our RESPONSIBILITY to get involved and not stand by.